Never Have Your Dog Stuffed by Alan Alda

I have officially finished the first book on my summer reading list! I completed "Never Have Your Dog Stuffed" by Alan Alda at the Royals game on Tuesday. I was actually surprised by this book, not because I didn't think it would be good but because I thought it would focus more on his M*A*S*H days. The book was about his entire career and his family, it didn't focus on M*A*S*H nearly as much, but did go into detail about the cast and how the world reacted to the series. I loved the end of the book where Alda talked about being asked to speak at graduations: "Mr. Alda do you think you could bless our students with some wise words?" or something to that effect. His response "For the love of God, don't ever have your dog stuffed!" While this may sound funny, it's actually sage advice. I really enjoyed this book and I'm really looking forward to reading the other Alda memoir. I'm normally not a fan of biographies/memoirs/autobiographies, but this one was very well written and wasn't dry. Over all 4 out of 5 stars.

You know you're getting old when..

buying a vacuum makes you giggle and spending an entire Thursday night vacuuming your house is the highlight of your week and you can't wait to call people to tell them about your new vacuum. Yep, this was me last week. I finally went out and bought us a new vacuum and spent about 4 hours vacuuming...which isn't really that long considering our house had not been vacuumed since March. Honestly, looking at all the crap that was coming out of the carpet made me want to vomit...I had to empty the canister about 10 times and when I washed the filter out it was caked with dust/dirt. I'm sure you're bored with my blog about vacuuming by now, but it was very exciting for me, even if it does make me feel old!

Dear Lord,

Thank you for granting me the self control to not kill people who are stupid and annoying. Even though it would be a service to the community if I rid the world of these people, thank you for showing me that a life in prison is not for me. I appreciate the fact that you have blessed me with a superior intelligence, but sometimes I wonder if it is a blessing, because it allows me to judge others ruthlessly and quickly become annoyed at whatever it is that they have to say. Perhaps this is my curse and my test is to see if I can actually survive and not kill anyone. Maybe when I meet the Gate Keeper, I can proudly say that I lived my life and did not murder anyone (even though they probably deserved it--of course this part will be mumbled under my breath). Once inside, I'm sure we'll have a jolly laugh at my expense because my entire existence will have been nothing but a source of amusement for you. Of course, we'll share these laughs over a cold beer while we watch others struggle to maintain composure when accosted by stupidity. So once again, thank you. I'd hate to spend my later years in jail because I couldn't control myself.
Sincerely,
Zero to Nuclear in 2.5 seconds (but with enough self control to allow you to leave alive!)